A theoretical and phenomenological investigation of the experience of loving

The objective of this study was to clarify and describe the experience of loving. A phenomenological-empirical approach was chosen, and 18 mature, articulate participants were interviewed about their experiences of loving in different periods of their lives. Interviews were semi-structured and were audiotape recorded. Also a theoretical and empirical literature review was conducted.

Data analysis involved verbatim transcription of the interviews and progressively collapsing the transcripts into "significant statements" from which various thematic content could be gleaned. This procedure emphasized fidelity to the participants' own words. A comprehensive list of themes was identified, which were then further collapsed into five major polar thematic continua. Major theme continue of loving were identified as 1) being together and close versus being separate and distant, 2) respecting and accepting versus being contemptuous and rejecting, 3) discovering and knowing versus stagnating and being ignorant, 4) being responsible and concerned versus being irresponsible and indifferent, and 5) being in harmony and expansive versus being in conflict and constricted. All interviews were coded according to the thematic system. A scoring manual was constructed summarizing the themes and presenting examples of significant statements representing each thematic continuum. Inter-rater reliabilities were calculated for three independent raters.

Results were discussed in terms of research approach, and in relation to previous empirical research on the nature of love. The relation of this study to earlier phenomenological studies on the experience of time and of body was discussed. Loving was discussed in relation to psychoanalytic theory, including classical psychoanalytic theory, object relations, and self psychology. Results were also considered in relation to issues of life span development and gender.

The need for longitudinal studies to clarify the nature of changes in loving over the life course was considered. The application of the present thematic structure to marital therapy was suggested, as well as further research into the relationship between the themes of loving and aspects of personality style and psychopathology.